Different Ways
by Iluvbeyblade
Summary: Bday There are many different ways to deal with grief. Some are more fun than others. KaiRay.


For Hollie-chan on her birthday! Have a good one, my lovely!

Enjoy!

* * *

They left the grieving to the people who knew him best. As Tyson's grandfather, hidden behind a screen, slid into the roaring flames of the crematorium, Kai and Ray shared a look and turned to make their escape.

It was shocking and they had both shed tears in private - but, see, that was the point. Neither were fond of public displays. So they left the Grangers standing in a sodden group outside the converted chapel, with Hilary and Kenny in floods of tears a few feet away (Hilary's desperation to comfort Tyson was just as obvious as his determination to bear it stoically like his father and brother) and Daichi sitting in a tree, furiously shredding its leaves and bark, and unobtrusively wandered around the corner to Kai's obscenely large car. Ray went inside, while Kai ran his hand once over Ray's closed door and slipped into the thickest patch of trees he could find.

Once safely ensconced in the wide, comfy passenger seat, Ray felt his self-control begin to slide from his previously firm grasp. Prickly heat spread over his eyes and nose and he stared fixedly at the wing mirror. He breathed deeply and very, very slowly, holding each breath for as long as possible because somehow sobs were at their most eager when he had no air in his lungs. Tears made his vision wobble but he held them where they were. Perfect balance.

The sound of the driver's door opening brought him back to earth with a cold shiver. Still he kept his eyes fixed on the shifting view in the windscreen, even as the car purred into life. Kai released the handbrake and moved into first gear. Out of the corner of his blurry vision, Ray saw red mixed in with the familiar peripheral view of Kai's hand. Attention caught, he looked at it, reaching out to trace the bleeding cuts and grazes gently. Tears, jolted from his eyes by the sudden movement, splashed onto the raw skin as if aimed.

"Different ways," Kai said quietly. Ray looked at him, noticing a lump purpling on his blue painted cheek. The remainder of his tears had followed their vanguard and were now racing down his cheek in two textbook trickles.

Yes, everyone dealt with grief in different ways. He held it all inside until he was alone then allowed himself to find the balance and zone out. Kai, however, waited until he was alone then took out his distress on any handy inanimate objects. Generally, he needed at least two 'sessions' - Ray studied his face and decided tiredly that he was still almost as furious as he had been before. Kai needed a distraction and, although he would never admit it, a good bitch tended to do the job.

"I don't think Tyson'll ever forgive Max for not being here," Ray said casually, dropping the bait and hoping Kai would bite.

"I don't think Max'll ever forgive himself," Kai replied after a short pause. "Or, more relevantly, Judy."

"Judy?"

A small smile spread over Kai's face; it was rare that he knew something before Ray. "Yeah, she wouldn't let him go."

Ray scoffed. "Come on, you're telling me he couldn't sneak away?"

"The last available night he could have left, she locked him in their training room and surrounded the place with guards."

"She's psychotic," Ray said with a disgusted whistle. Kai nodded. "How do you know this, anyway?"

"He rang me yesterday. He'd rung Tyson and he'd thought the same as you; he could've got away if he'd _really_ wanted to."

"And you didn't think that?"

"Of Max? No. I'd've thought it of anyone else, but not the kid who still played pillow-fights against Tyson when we last met up. He's too honest." Kai's hand tightened briefly around the gearstick, sliding it back into neutral and switching the engine off. "He was crying."

"Oh."

"Mm." Ray watched with concern as Kai rubbed his scarred eye.

"Headache?" he asked, wriggling around in his seat so that almost all his body was facing Kai. Kai nodded again.

"Just tension. Nothing I can't handle."

"You think you can handle _everything_," Ray accused. Kai gave him a weary grin and squeezed his hand. Ray squeezed back. No meagre love-pats, both squeezed hard enough to feel bones start to shift. As with so much else in the relationship, it was about mostly joking competition. Ray raised their linked hands to his lips and, wickedly, kissed Kai's most painful graze.

"Bastard." But there was a wonderfully familiar look in Kai's eyes now, and Ray rejoiced in the success of his plan as their lips met and they did the best they could without being skewered by the gearstick.

"You realise," Kai said raggedly some time later, "that this would look fairly bad if we were seen. It's a funeral." Ray thought about this for a few seconds then shrugged and said, with a glint in his eye,

"Different ways."

* * *

Apologies for the sombre subject matter - had my grandfather's funeral yesterday so when I sat down to write it was kind of all that was in my head. Aren't Kai and Ray disrespectful? xD

Opinions welcomed!

xIlbx


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